In a night tempered with the
poignancy that followed Jamie Dolan’s untimely
death, his former team-mate, the legendary Dougie Arnott, was given the
long-awaited testimonial he deserved. Motherwell legends including Tommy
Coyne, Rab McKinnon, Stevie Kirk and cult heroes Colin O’Neill and Sieb Dykstra
had signed up to participate in this showpiece occasion versus an Old Firm
Select containing Ally McCoist, Andy Walker, and other former Motherwell stars
such as Tom Boyd, Willie Falconer and Paul Lambert. It was the sort of
match-up not seen since Hogan v the Warrior at Summerslam
'89, and neither team disappointed the fans,
dishing out a goal-fest with Motherwell narrowly losing 5-4, aided by Andy Walkers
highly dubious spot-kick!
After a well observed minute’s
applause for the tragic Dolan, who was due to take part last night, the
Motherwell side kicked off. From the Phil O’Donnell stand, it looked like
somebody had accidentally pressed the slow motion button, as the likes of
Martin and McCart sprayed the ball around 5 yards at a time, at a complete
canter, albeit with the softness of blowfelts cat hand. Layoffs into space
on the left-wing, which were so effective for the runs of Rab McKinnon about 10
years ago, found the opposition, who, it has to be said, looked comfortable in
possession, but with big Sieb in goals plucking crosses from the air like you
pluck apples from a (6ft) tree, Motherwell looked in no mood to concede many
goals. And with the Motherwell forward bombing forward like the Luftwaffe
heading for the British shores, it was not long before the punters got what
they came for: a beauty from Dougie! Finding more space than a Russian
satellite, Dougie produced a cushioned volley into the corner, across the
ailing Kerr in goals. It would be ambitious to compare it to Van Basten’s
in the Euro’s, and perhaps a bit unfair. I mean Dougie’s was phenomenal!
Motherwell hit the bar shortly
after, but the first half belonged to the Old Firm select. With an
eruption not too unlike the one in Montseraat in ‘97, they racked up 4 goals,
as McCoist showed he’s still got it by netting two. It being the
ability to toe-bash home a jammy goal from inside the box. The first was
a trademark howler from big Sieb who pounced on the ball only to fumble it into
the path of the striker who slotted home from an acute angle. Walker’s
penalty made it two, and although the referee wouldn’t be drawn post-match on
the brown envelope and slap on the arse wee Andy gave him, allegations
permeated through the crowd, who responded with the customary jeers any
opposition goal deserves! More chances came thick and fast, a bit like
some of the Old Firm players actually, and when the whistle blew at 4, it was a
welcome break for the struggling home side.
As the second period got underway,
a large cheer broke out as Colin O’Neill made a 15minute cameo, clearly
sponsored by Carlsberg, as the semi final hero from ’91 got the chance to score
from the spot after Kirk was cruelly cut down in the box. Despite the
protestations from the defender, who was about as innocent as OJ Simpson, the
ref gave the penalty, and O’Neill rammed home to the delight of the crowd
before his forward roll and salute, barely reminiscent of that glorious night
in ‘91, drew laughs and cheers from the adoring crowd.
Although McCoist completed his
hat-trick after poise and grace not seen since Night Fever by Miller on the
right, the Old Firm select were toiling, as Motherwell created chance after
chance, with slick one-touch passing bringing back memories of the halcyon era
of the early 90’s. Kirk, Coyne and Arnott could well be heading for a
spell at Guantanamo Bay if word gets back to the Americans of the relentless
terrorising of the defence. It would be harsh to say Gerry Britton has
the turning circle of an Eddy Stobart on ice. Harsh on the freighter that
is, as he, and several other of the Old Firm select were firmly in the pocket
of their Motherwell counterparts for long periods as the game drew to a close.
With the goalkeeper taking more
shots than Tony Montana, it was only a matter of time before Motherwell added a
quick fire 3rd and 4th to the delight of the crowd.
Just like Rockys first fight v Clubber Lang, the game ended prematurely when
the Old firm side waved their white flag, with the referee commenting that kids
might be watching, and he didn’t want them to witness the inevitable massacre
that would ensue from the mighty Motherwell army.
A standing ovation ensued as Dougie
Arnott took one final bow at Fir Park, and a well deserved one, for a player
who spent his entire career at Motherwell, ignoring the advances of both Milan
and Barcelona, who themselves had no’ bad sides back in the day. Indeed,
Romario owes his career to Dougie, there’s no way he would’ve got a game at the
Nou Camp had Dougie accepted the alleged £10m transfer!
Neil Kelly